This makes me angry. Irrationally, compulsively and pathologically angry.

   

Lucky old Pizza…, originally uploaded by jweisfeldadams.

It’s not even the extra apostrophe that bothers me; it’s the whole thing. The zany use of ‘Z’, the lack of spaces – everything! Oooh I could crush a grape!

I notice that the phone number is clearly visible.

I would like to categorically state that I in no way want anyone reading this blog post to phone that number (+44 (0) 1984 639 990) and try any form of ill-advised japery.

Examples of stunts I am absolutely not advising you to pull include the following:

  1. Asking to speak to Mike Hunt (certainly don’t try to convince the person on the telephone to shout that name out to see if any of the customers respond).
  2. Ordering 14 pizzas to be delivered to a local address picked at random.
  3. Giving a long and complicated order for about 20 people, changing your mind at regular intervals and then at the end just canceling it all and asking for a “fillet o’fish for my vife” in a European accent.

So don’t even think about it.

*UPDATE*

For those of you who aren’t from the UK or for those of you who just don’t remember 15 year old McDonald’s adverts, here is a video that will explain the ‘fillet o’fish’ comment. It’s inexplicably burnt into my memory.